Blog private now. :/

Cause I think my blog too personal, and am only inviting people I trust.

Another setback today.. Well, cant really say its a setback. Ya still gonna endeavor through, till the end. Whether its a failure, or a success. Apparently, not talking to her much caused our "relationship" between friends to deteriorate. Now, I'm a step further to succeed. Definitely at a losing side now.

Asked her out as a group and she said "erh see first". Ah dammit... DAMMIT. Hopefully she will be willing. And i gonna make full use of it, but not overdoing it of course. Life is sureeeeeeeee intricating and intriguing. Its too early to tell whether I'm succeeding anot. BUT, its also too early to tell whether AM I FAILING.

But the feeling I have now as I blog, I'm thinking its a failure. It seems like a delusion. Not sure whether my feelings are accurate anot. Because, I'm disheartened to continue pursuing what I wish to. I'm kinda detered now.

Also got no topic to talk to her. Just dont feel like talking to her. Afraid of her replies. Some replies can make me feel damn sad. But today never. However, her replies compared to last time, its not as good. Even though she still got some interest in talking.

Should I talk to her now? She's still online(12.13am). How yellow you can be.. Sigh.

Stucking in a love issue is not my life! I still wanna make full use of my time instead of dreading over love.

Apparently in Secondary school, no boys have ever "wooed" her before. And that means I'm the first. But, she's the type of girls that dont want start a relationship.

Yesterday was ironic(12.17am), KianLeng asked me to join the CounterSTRIKE competition. If it was Anime Fight(IT WOULDNT BE A PROBLEM) - Only those who play Warcraft 3 knows what I'm talking about. I suck at CounterSTRIKE, and I gonna start practicsing. Not gonna drag down the team!

Then later 9am need go back school help Yuan Hui. {Can I sleep... 3pm need meet Melvin for a interesting session.)

Cant sleep. Shes still online. I CANT BEAR TO OFFLINE. This kind of lifestyle damn depressing. "LET ME LIKE NO ONE" AHHHHHH. But that's impossible. I got this feeling that tells me umpteen times that I will fail no matter what. "Stop trying, no matter what you do. SHE WILL NEVER ACCEPT YOU." By the way she reply my message, she show no interest. Ask her out say see first. Damn depressing.

I'm damn hesitant to talk to her. When I talk to her, I will think that am I overdoing it. TOO BAD! "I'm not a CLAIRVOYANT" Neither am I an omniscient.
Polarity between "relaxment" and stres. Is that a vast different?
Love and Hate. Vast different?

All humans have innate abilities.


Please tell me your opinions in my tagbox.

Guess thats too bad. I'm reconsidering. I may not pursue. Might stop.
Maybe I should commit myself in something else.

HaiHaiHai.. I think i go practice counterstrike now.

Sayonara.